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This was written for ficwip's All Ships Week 2025 (which includes friendships). I set out to write a cute and fluffy friendship fic, but it turns out, when two people who have lived all their lives pursuing some form of career violence (whether it be socially acceptable, like fight in a war, or socially unacceptable, like be Gollum), are allowed to talk freely with each other with no one to intervene or change the subject, they get into dark places, sometimes without warning. I also keep putting them in the way of really unpleasant events, and that part's my fault.
HUGE shoutout to https://www.fantasynamegenerators.com/lord-of-the-rings.php Every name in this that wasn't from canon is from that generator. :')
I can't keep track of who owns what regarding Tolkien's works. Rest assured that I own none of it. This is a transformative work made for fun and I do not make any profit from sharing it.